No one read this anyways...

But here are some updates.
I quit my shitty job.
I am victorious over victory rolls.
I wore victory rolls to my job interview.
I was victorious, and ended up 17 and starting as a server. Unheard of, apparently.
The GM left.
Victory became fail.
I hate my job.
I love money.

So this is likely going to focus on my ranting about my new job. My GM is an evil witch and I want to shove her stout body in the frialator. I will run her through the dish machine. Dear god I will ruin her.
Except I won't. She will try to ruin me.
Fuckdamnit this ain't happening.

IL DUCE ONCE MORE??

65 DEGREES //////////////////////////HARLEY RIDER WANTED ............... TYPE IN THE WIND ........PHOTO ,A LITTLE ABOUT YOU

I'm hoping it is. I really hope it is.

Il Duche strikes agin!

And this time he's looking for a "bikerbABE."

ok--1ST OF ALL--I DON'T GO OTHERSITES/AIM/OR ANY OTHER BULLSHIT---USE MY EMAIL ADDRESS ONLY----its time to find a gal who wants to rideeeeeee---must be nice shape/girligirl/race doesn't matter//age between 35 to 50-----smokeris ok---not a drunk or druggie----no baggage/drama/or BS:-----IN THE SUBJECT BOX ---PUT BIKERBABE or it will not be answered----im 50's-----bald by choice w/gotee---couple pics taken here 2 weeks ago from laconia weekend-----------i ride the ''gratefull dead''---if u know your music---------i want 2 c full pics----and tell me something about ya---im not looking for a ''bootiecall'' unless you want---im 4 yrs.celibute-----im italian/single/sincere/comical/and streetwise----NO SCAMERS/------BE SINCERE OR BE GONE---------------REMEMBER''BIKERBABE'' IN SUBJECT------------MORE LATER-------------IM ALOTTA FUN---IF YOU WANT A MANNNNN---EMAIL ME!

Craiglist Fun

IM A SINGLE ITALIAN MAN---WHO ENJOYS THE COMPANY OF A SBF---------BETWEEN 30 AND 50---NICE SHAPE/WORKING/LIKES HARLEYS/BOATS/RV'S-----IS A PLUS,AND IF U NEVER HAVE DONE IT---ITS TIME YOU DID-----WEIGHT BETWEEN 105 TO 150#'S------NO KIDS LIVING W/U-----IM NOT INTO RELIGION(OK IF U R---BUT NOT ME)---I DON'T WANT TO RAISE KIDS,NOT ME------HAVE YOUR OWN CAR ETC.-----IM NOT LOOKING TO BE ANYBODY'S SUGARDADDY------AND IM STREETWISE/IM ABOUT NO-BOOZE/DRUGS/DRAMA/BAGGAGE/DISEASE OR BS:::::::::::WHEN U MAIL ME-----ADDRESS ME AS ''IL DUCHE'' IN SUBJECT BOX OR HEADING OF LETTER----------------ALL ANSWERS W/NO PICS WILL BE DELETED AS SCAM --SPAM---ETC.---IM NOT INTO GAMES OR CYBER LOVE-----I DON'T CARE WHERE U R IN NEW ENGLAND--I LIKE A ''GIRLIEGIRL'' TYPE AND A WOMAN WHO CAN COOK AT LEAST A LITTLE---LOL----IMM BALD BY CHOICE W/GOTEE--------IF YOUR A BBW---IM NOT INTERESTED---JUST MY PREFERENCE---ONE OF US IS ENOUGH!--LOL-------ANYWAYS----IM ALSO KNOWN AS ''THE CHOCKLATE CHIP COOKIE EATA''----TAKE THAT ANY OF THE 3 WAYS U WANT---IM CELIBUTE 3 YRS.SO IM NOT LOOKING FOR BOOTYCALLS UNLESS YOU HAPPEN 2 B A WOMAN WHO CATCHES MY EYE AND IS AGRESSIVE--------------IF U R UNDER 30 AND YOU WANT A ''FATHER FIGURE'' ITS OK---IF U R OVER 50 BUT BUT FILL A BILL OF A YOUNGER WOMAN---THATS OK TOO-------------I JUST KNOW WHAT APPEALS 2 ME AND WHAT DOESN'T-----IM AN INTERESTING PERSON BECAUSE OF MY PAST------IM A SONGWRITTER/AND HAVE SMALL BUSSINESS HERE----IM A CALLY GUY AS WELL AS A BOSTONIAN............PICS OF U DRESSED UP/BIKINI/JEANS ---WHATEVER----NO,DEARY---NOT NUDES---IT DOES NOTHING FOR ME----ONLY IF U R IN FRONT OF ME AND I CAN TOUCH AND BITE U---LOL---------OK---THERE IT IS---OH IM FOOTBALL LOVER ALSO-------THE BALLS IN YOUR PARK----TOUCHDOWN OR FUMBLE--------------------IL DUCHE

Listen to Il Duche.

Failure Rolls

My latest fun project involves hair and make-up for what I thought would be a musical based in the 1970s. For some unforeseeable reason, the director decided, with grand sweeping gestures, IT SHALL BE COSTUMED IN THE 1950S.

Makes perfect sense. Doesn't that just scream atomic paranoia? Questionable decisions aside, I thought it would be a great opportunity to practice various vintage hair styles.
VICTORY ROLLS ARE FUCKING HARD. SERIOUSLY.
I cannot grasp how the fuck they stay. I had it working for a few minutes, but it continually looks...off. I'm searching desperately for some rats to shove in these actress's hair. I've tried simple bobby pin methods and it ain't working.
Lordy lou I'm about to start praying.

Straight Up Review

Loreal Bare Naturale Powdered Mineral Foundation
I picked this up from CVS because I don't feel like driving to the mall for some Bare Minerals. Also, I hate Bare Minerals on the basis of annoying ads. It doesn't cover great enough to justify the price, and the colors just outright don't suit me. But, on account of my horrendous skin, I figured some minerals were worth a shot.
It's about 10 bucks and you get a decent amount. Covered much better than I anticipated. The lightest color was almost a little too light, certainly lighter than the color of my face, but it matched the color of my neck pretty well. As far as I can tell, it's worth buying again.

Loreal Bare Naturale Powdered Mineral Concealer
Worked way better than I expected. They don't give you enough for what you're paying, but the shit does its job.
Maybe buying again, unless something else tempts me.

My hair is cooking.

Ion Color Brilliance Powdered Lightener
Ion Sensitive Scalp 20 vol developer

Figuring I have this awesome sensitive skin that extends to my scalp, the developer seemed like a wise investment. If it sucks....I've got some 40 in my cabinet.
I'm going to tone with Shimmer Lights afterward. This cute girl at Sally's has platinum hair that is a lovely color, despite her choice to style it all wonky. She recommended it, so let's hope for the best.
Another 15 minutes and I should be enlightened. From a dirty girl to a platinum starlet!

Note: This bleach smells fucking amazing. Seriously. If I need to commit suicide, you bet your ass I'm huffing this stuff.

Straight Up Review

Manic Panic Hot Hot Pink

More purple toned than anticipated, it took pretty well on my natural level 6/5 highlighted hair. It grabbed the bleached portions better, but it did pick up all of it. My hair felt soft and lovely after this, but it runs like a bitch. Seriously. You're getting stains in your shower. It fades fairly quickly, but will not remove itself completely without the aid of something harsh and salty. But that's how we like it, right girls?


Manic Panic Virgin Snow Toner

Shit looks serious. It may be, but I left it on for quite some time and it worked, just didn't whiten the bleached portions of my hair by any means. It manged to give it a nice reflective and refined shimmer without making it ashy. However, as beautiful as the initial color was, it fades. This stuff was out of my hair, leaving it an awkward reddish shade once more. Though strawberry blonde was fun, it pulled a bit of a brassy tone once it was all out. I'd buy again if it lasted longer.



Clairol Born Blonde Beautiful Beige Toner

I wanted something to keep my base color from looking too brassy. Bleach usually works wonderfully on my hair, leaving it a delicate light blonde, but I didn't bleach out the pink. Instead I used a hi-lift color, and that, I learned, will leave me fairly brassy. So, I thought this would give me a more "neutral" tone. It did. It also brought it down at least a level. Don't get me wrong, the color was beautiful. It looked like natural hair, matching my complexion perfectly. But...natural ain't what I aim for. So, nah, not buying it again.

"If you're a virgin, I'm a muslim!"

This is a two-fer.


So I had some nasty roots going on. It was leaving me a little sad, and horrible impulse control was leaving me poor. So instead of resisting the strange urge to buy expensive new varieties of iced-tea, I took it like a man and booked it to Sally's.

Horror. I only ever heard horror stories from those dying their own hair. So I decided to dye part of my hair pink to help distract from the disgusting pool of realness on top of my head. It went well. I was shocked at just how well it went. Sooo well.

I'm a cutie; I know. Manic Panic Hot Hot Pink left in foil for about an hour. Occurred perfectly.

Then I decided I was done with that and highlighted my hair. BY MYSELF. My mother was very against this, but as we in the erotic sales business say...fuck it! I was blonde, bodacious, and ready to take on the world.

Then I must have been high because I dyed all of my hair bright pink. I don't know. It looked beautiful by the second day, and I was thoroughly convinced I would be some suicide girl vixen. Then I applied for a job. Back to blonde. This is a sick, chemical merry-go-round I ride.

It was a love story until I needed to apply for a job. That I didn't get it. Suck it, Starbucks, I'm hotter than your naked mermaid anyways. But, in a desperate and sad attempt to try and gain the respect of Starbucks, I dyed my hair back to blonde. I used two Wella Color Charm 12C high-lift cream colors and mixed it with a 40 developer. Though I do not aim for cool tones in my hair, I had to counteract the pink somehow. That goddamn pink would be gone. And so it was gone, leaving me with an oddly pink toned but entirely blonde head of hair. Note that I am NOT topless in that picture, it just looked that way. Really, I'm way perkier than that. But then I returned to the land of the manic and panic once more, and used some virgin snow toner on that shit.

The final result was beautiful and left me in tears. I was the summery Malibu blonde I always dreamed of, and I could finally rest knowing I achieved it when hairdressers would never do it for me.

Le Fuschia Concedes

This is what pink hair has become. It was once a daring and vibrant conquest. It has been reduced to strange old ladies who likely reek of feline piss doing it to raise breast cancer awareness.
First off, I love these tits. Don't get me wrong. Hell, they're my back-up plan. But seriously? Wearing pink does jack-shit for breast cancer. BECAUSE PEOPLE WEAR PINK REGARDLESS OF CANCER.

That aside, this is my official goodbye to pink hair. The dye is sitting lonely on my vanity, waiting for me to use it, and seeing some random attractive girl on Animal Planet with an under-layer of pink made me swear off it. For a few months, at least. It's getting played out, and that shit stains.

If anyone ever needs a free dye-job with a thing of Manic Panic Red Passion I need to get rid of....holla-back-girl.